The Little Mother

I often wondered how quickly she adapted to her, how easily she accommodated her in her life, how comfortably she slipped into the role of a little mother to her baby sister.

I have two daughters, with an age difference of 8 years between them. They are 10.5 and 2.5 now. In the past two and a half years, if there is something that I have come to realise, it is that my younger one has not one but two mothers. Her sister is more like a second mother to her. This is not to say that they don’t have their fair share of sibling rivalry and fights, but there is an unspoken responsibility that my elder one has taken upon herself and that is to mother her sister, when I’m not around or when I’m busy to do it myself.

On a recent trip overseas, the only thing that helped me maintain my sanity while shopping, eating, sightseeing and more, was the fact that my elder daughter made sure her sister was happy, entertained and safe. She made sure that while the whole family had fun as a unit, I did get my fair share of ‘me’ time.

I feel that at times we are unreasonable in our expectations from our elder one. We often ask her to adjust because the younger one is out-of-control or is throwing a tantrum which we can’t bear any further (and we do feel extremely guilty about it). But I have to give it to her for not even reacting negatively to this. It’s like she is saying, “Mom and Dad, It’s okay…I understand.”

While there are times when I am ready to pull my hair out because the two of them are at loggerheads with each other, I feel that now, somehow, both of them feel incomplete without each other. For example, as much as the elder one was reluctant to share her recently bought Lego set with the younger one, she also didn’t want to make it without her because she wasn’t having fun doing it alone. And while the younger one gets super annoyed if her sister keeps, so much so as, a finger on her pillow, but would eventually snuggle up to her and sleep peacefully in her arms while sharing a blanket….with her second mother.

And there is nothing more heartwarming for a mother than to see her children peacefully share a blanket, share a home, share love….share a life!